Hey and welcome to my fourth post. Based on multiple requests I've decided that this post will be all about how to deal with bullying in your life. I'll be covering things from how to identify it to how to fix the situation.
Just like every problem, in order to defeat and overcome it we need to understand what it really is. According to multiple sources bullying is "Repeated, persistent and aggressive behaviour intended to cause fear, distress, or harm to another person's body, emotions, self-esteem or reputation. " In easier words, bullying is the repeated offense meant to cause a negative effect in another person. There are four main types of bullying:
- Verbal: name-calling, insults, racist comments...
- Social: spreading rumours, embarrassing the person, hurting somebody's reputation...
- Physical: hitting, kicking, damaging property...
- Cyber: humiliation through social media, verbal or emotional bullying through texting...
In each case of bullying there are three roles that are filled: the bully/attacker, the bullied/victim and the bystander. According to researches, over 3.2 million students are victims of bullying each year and almost 160,000 teens miss school every day because of their situation with bullying. These number are way too high and people need to start taking a stand to get them lower. Being bullied s an adolescent can have major damage effects in the future, such as depression, malnourishment, poor education etc. Teens who were bullied also have a higher suicide attempt rate and its only gotten worse with the growing threat of cyberbullying.
I, myself, have had a long past with being bullied and I don’t believe anybody should have to live through such a thing. It truly is a horrible phenomenon that keeps appearing more and more and that in itself is a huge issue. Also, it is something that no matter what will stay with you. No, it won't hurt the same a it once did but you don't forget situation like that.
I remember once when i was little and went on a school field trip to a place called Safety Village. A police officer held up a drawing of a boy and said “Say whatever you want to this boy”. As more and more kids yelled out negative comments such as “you’re ugly” towards the picture, the officer would crumple up the paper until he had it in a ball. The he told us to apologize to the picture. Once again the students followed what he said and began yelling out apologies. As the more “I'm sorry” got yelled, the officer would unravel the page and he was left with a wrinkle paper with the image of a boy on it. The students didn't understand why the page didn't go back to normal and that's when the police officer said “No matter how much you say i'm sorry, this boy will always be different because of your mean words.” To date, that remains one of the most important lessons I have ever learned.
Now I'm not going to type up some long winded speech about how if you just say no and stand up to your bully everything will be ok and you'll com out of this situation hand in hand as friends because let’s be honest, that most likely will never happen. Life is not a movie and you can’t expect the same results as one either. I will, however, inform you on the best ways to deal with your bullying situation that I’ve personally found very useful and effective.
- Tell an adult: I know this may seem like the scariest option but believe me it helps a ton. The best solution would be to go directly to a teacher, parent or adult figure that you trust right from the start in order to stop the problem at it's root. Naturally, the victim might be embarrassed to go to such a figure but you need to understand that without their help, the situation will most likely get worse.
- Talk it out: Sometimes it makes the victim feel a lot better to simply talk out their problem with a close friend or a kids help line where they can stay anonymous.
- Make it known: Make sure your attacker knows that you don’t appreciate their commentary or actions. On the contrary, try and stay strong. Most bullies do what they do merely to get a rise out of their victim; don’t feed their fire by reacting.
- Surround yourself: To stay strong in such a period of time, you can’t isolate yourself. I understand that, with the bullying, you might not be the most popular and that is perfectly ok. Personally I’ve never been popular but you don’t need 100 friends in order to get through being bullied. As long as you have two or three close, trustworthy friends by your side you can get through anything.
- Start/Join a movement: There are so many petitions and anti-bullying activities and petitions that should be out there in your community. If they are already in motion, join them. If they aren't there, create them. Even the smallest voice can be revolutionary and make the biggest change.
- Remember the truth: Bullies will make up any type of lie just to get a reaction. Never, and I mean never believe what they say to you. You have a purpose on this earth and no matter how many times they say otherwise will not change the fact that you have meaning and you are loved.
The most important thing to remember is never to become a bully yourself. No matter the situation, you need to think of your actions and words before hand and understand their consequences before you put them into action. Some bullies don't comprehend what they are doing because they simply think that they're being funny and joking around. Not all jokes or pranks are taken with the same thought process which means you need to avoid hurting or offending people. Also, everybody is unique and has their forces and weaknesses, but it is not up to you or anybody else to point them out. Nobodies perfect and it's ok to be different.
On that note, I conclude this post. I am so sorry if you're going through or have gone through such a terrible situation like bullying. If you ever need more advice on this topic or just need a friend while you’re going through a rough patch, please don’t hesitate to email me and I’ll try my best to help you out. If you have any ideas for future topics or questions you would like advice for, please don't be shy and leave a comment containing what you would like me to discuss. If you would rather stay anonymous feel free to email me at allib.blogs@gmail.com and I'll answer your question while keeping your identity unknown to the rest of the readers.
A song that's helped me through a lot of tough times
What I used as inspiration for this post:
- Friends, Family members and Teachers
Until next time...
I really like this post because it's a big problem in our society today. I, myself, have been bullied before and it isn't fun. These tips are very helpful for someone going through some sort of bullying. I also agree that it's a good idea to tell someone about if you are being bullied because if you don't tell someone, it's not gonna get better. I also like your layout for your blog, very well done! Good luck with the rest of your blog!
ReplyDeleteHello Alison , love the blog it is truly power fulling when other students stand up to bullying .think every child have some form of bullying it the hardest when come from family like siblings , cousin or even parent . Do you believe in the saying Bullies bully because they are not happy .
ReplyDeleteHey Allison, I think it's really cool that you've decided to choose this topic and that you've decided to talk about bullying. I find that you're advice really gives different perspectives of the situations that teenagers face. I also think that the background picture that you used really fits your topic and it's really cute. I can't wait to read your next post!
ReplyDeleteHey Allison, I really liked your last post. Bullying is really important and raising awareness through posts like this is really important. Also, since a lot of teenagers have to deal with this daily and so it's really important to the subject you picked. I have another idea for a subject that I'm not sure if you've done yet. I need to make a playlist for a pool party so I was wondering if maybe you wrote like a list of songs for different events like workouts or parties or something like that.
ReplyDelete